But...and this is a huge one....my mom is going to love it. That's all that matters.
She will know that it is full of love.
Tuesday, December 10
How to Quilt
I hope you aren't really here to learn how to quilt, because of the talents I have, quilting is not going to be one.
Friday, December 6
A special word about the holidays
(As we get ready for the joy and excitement of Christmas, I just want to share these thoughts. The holidays are hard for so many people.)
I'm a member of a club, one that I didn't join, didn't fill out the forms, didn't pay the membership dues and honestly, didn't want to be a member.
I'm a part of the "infertiles", those that have and still suffer from the pain and struggle of the inability to either conceive or carry a child to term. As a Christian and a lifelong church attender, infertility kicked my faith to the curb for a long time. It was challenged, tested and confused. Holidays were hard for obvious reasons, as children are the focus of so many activities. Church services were no exception.
As I sat in the pew at Christmas, it hit me: A VIRGIN had a child, but not me. I prayed, I tried, I had the best medical help around. I had given up, taken holidays, cool baths and room temperature drinks, no carrots, taken temperatures at the crack of dawn (apologies to my sister, she hates that phrase!) and so many odd little tricks you learn over the years. And yet there I sat, year after year, childless, broken, in pain. And I listened to the miracle of a Virgin birth.
It should have been calming, knowing that God can do anything, he can perform miracles, that I should trust without question and He would take care of me, just one person in a huge world that He loves as much as every flower in the field. I knew that in my head. But my heart hurt.
A virgin...birth...child...miracle. It is the Christmas story we celebrate as Christians. It is a thing of beauty, hope and grace. But not for me, not those years. I was just mad. It was like a punch in the face; haha, she carried a child, you didn't. You lose. You are a failure, empty, barren and in pain. I don't share this as my story for any other reason than this:
As you sit in your pews this holiday season, look around you. Someone in your pew may be me: a person that is in pain, lost empty and feeling alone. Feeling like everyone around them is happy and celebrating, and they are the only one in this club. They want their membership revoked, and now.
They are counting they days in 14 day increments, just hoping for their miracle, only to be turned down, their membership renewed on a rotating 28 day cycle. And it hurts to be reminded of it in the one place that should be comforting. The reality is that church isn't always that comforting place when you are in pain.
So, look down your pew this Sunday. Who is there? Really look: has someone suffered a loss this year? Is someone sitting alone? Is there a couple that just seems....off, detached, sad?
Reach out. Say hi. "I'm sorry for your loss" is the best comment you can give (and then be quiet and listen). To the childless couple, just ask what their plans are for the holiday...is family coming in? Are they travelling? Just start the conversation and then really listen to the conversation. If they are fine, you'll know. If they aren't, you might open the door to something deeper. That has happened to me a lot over the past years: a simple hi, how are you, paying attention, and I know. I've met friends this way, friends going through infertile times that hasn't talked to anyone, but by opening the door, we've both been blessed by the relationship.
So this holiday season, Celebrate! Be amazed by the miracle of birth and renewal and the grace that is offered. I know I am. But also slow down. Pay attention. Look. Listen. Be aware that not all are feeling the joy of the season. Some have been given membership in a group of which they never wanted to be a part of.
I'm a part of the "infertiles", those that have and still suffer from the pain and struggle of the inability to either conceive or carry a child to term. As a Christian and a lifelong church attender, infertility kicked my faith to the curb for a long time. It was challenged, tested and confused. Holidays were hard for obvious reasons, as children are the focus of so many activities. Church services were no exception.
As I sat in the pew at Christmas, it hit me: A VIRGIN had a child, but not me. I prayed, I tried, I had the best medical help around. I had given up, taken holidays, cool baths and room temperature drinks, no carrots, taken temperatures at the crack of dawn (apologies to my sister, she hates that phrase!) and so many odd little tricks you learn over the years. And yet there I sat, year after year, childless, broken, in pain. And I listened to the miracle of a Virgin birth.
It should have been calming, knowing that God can do anything, he can perform miracles, that I should trust without question and He would take care of me, just one person in a huge world that He loves as much as every flower in the field. I knew that in my head. But my heart hurt.
A virgin...birth...child...miracle. It is the Christmas story we celebrate as Christians. It is a thing of beauty, hope and grace. But not for me, not those years. I was just mad. It was like a punch in the face; haha, she carried a child, you didn't. You lose. You are a failure, empty, barren and in pain. I don't share this as my story for any other reason than this:
As you sit in your pews this holiday season, look around you. Someone in your pew may be me: a person that is in pain, lost empty and feeling alone. Feeling like everyone around them is happy and celebrating, and they are the only one in this club. They want their membership revoked, and now.
They are counting they days in 14 day increments, just hoping for their miracle, only to be turned down, their membership renewed on a rotating 28 day cycle. And it hurts to be reminded of it in the one place that should be comforting. The reality is that church isn't always that comforting place when you are in pain.
So, look down your pew this Sunday. Who is there? Really look: has someone suffered a loss this year? Is someone sitting alone? Is there a couple that just seems....off, detached, sad?
Reach out. Say hi. "I'm sorry for your loss" is the best comment you can give (and then be quiet and listen). To the childless couple, just ask what their plans are for the holiday...is family coming in? Are they travelling? Just start the conversation and then really listen to the conversation. If they are fine, you'll know. If they aren't, you might open the door to something deeper. That has happened to me a lot over the past years: a simple hi, how are you, paying attention, and I know. I've met friends this way, friends going through infertile times that hasn't talked to anyone, but by opening the door, we've both been blessed by the relationship.
So this holiday season, Celebrate! Be amazed by the miracle of birth and renewal and the grace that is offered. I know I am. But also slow down. Pay attention. Look. Listen. Be aware that not all are feeling the joy of the season. Some have been given membership in a group of which they never wanted to be a part of.
Monday, December 2
Changing rooms: Living room to dining room
Today I made huge strides towards making the "living room" into the "dining room-library". Yes, I'm still not really sure what to call it. I do know that we have all used this space so much more since moving the table in there, so it has been a great change.
It was this......
...and is now this:
...a
I needed to get this part of the rooms done now since this is where the Christmas tree goes! Let the decorating being!
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