Love it! Pint it! Do it! Challenge!

I was surfing Pinterest a while back looking for some crafts to share with my moms group....found this....and fell in L.O.V.E!  

via Crystal Sixta/Pinterest

 

I knew I would get it done as I would be doing it with my MOPS group; alas, we were snow/weathered out twice before Valentine's Day!  We finally got a chance to try it on the actual February 14th, but I was so busy organizing and chatting away that mine never got done. 

UP comes the Pinterest Challenge...oh yeah!  This is a great opportunity to join up with other bloggers and DIY'ers to get something actually done, and not just pinned, from Pinterest.  I'm linking today with Sherry from Young House Love, Katie from Bower Power, Megan from The Remodeled Life, and Michelle from Decor and the Dog.  Go visit their sites to see their projects, and links to many more great ideas!

Back to getting things done.....And Done I Did.

But I wanted to do a different spin on the project.  I have an issue with actually changing out holiday decorations, which translated, means I don't.  Meaning it took the Super Bowl party to make us get the Christmas tree put away; a certain holiday decoration I love stayed out all year one year; my mantle is just, well, a mantle.  I put things up there I like, but not necessarily seasonal. 

So this project had to hang around all year, and while "LOVE" can be a year-long idea, I wanted more.   And more means less, as I had most of these supplies on hand already. 

The wood blocks are from a great supplier online here: wood blocks online.  They cost $0.50 each.  I had an assortment of papers leftover from other projects, and picked up a few more at Joann's Fabric for a great sale price this week.  I spent very little overall, and have a lot of leftovers: I'm already thinking of cute little gift ideas for friends!  A little modpodge, paper, a letters (also on cheapo sale this week) and here we go with a year-round fun little accent: 

 And if you can't read top to bottom that way....

....you can move them!

 

 These can also hang around until fall season:

...and move on into the holidays!

 

I also have some paper to keep going: there are six sides to fill!  I can envision more blocks with fall motifs, 4th of July and more: What can you picture?  I counted (and had to check the spelling of!) Hanukkah, which would take 2 more blocks, but that's just more fun to play with.

 

So, share a little LOVE or SPRING or BOO or any other holiday your family celebrates and enjoy the fun!  This is a great project to share with your kids!

A tiling we will go....a tiling we will go....

Heigh ho and merry-oh: I think I could tile all day!  Thankfully you'll be saved from my singing, but I've learned that laying tile makes me happy like a happy kinda song.

My first project was this just to add a little bit of tile to a table top I had purchased from World Market.  That went pretty well, and I found I really enjoyed it.  At this point, I'm surprised I don't have tile on all the flat surfaces in my house.  But for now, I'll keep it simple.

This second project was a freebie.  This tray is an old brown in/out box my husband had from his first job.  It came home with him, and he had some kind of emotional connection with it.  This ugly brown box was moved around the garage (and moved with us from one house to the next!).  Every time I could ask him if it was a "toss" or "donate" pile item, he would say no, it was a keeper.  So I kept it, which is completely against my anti-hoarding personality.

I finally had had enough.  It was use it or lose it time.  The ugly brown in-box first got a new coat of paint, leftover from this project.

 I

 Next, I played with the tiles (leftover from this project, another freebie) until I settle on a plain fill-er-in type of pattern.

 Next, it's time to dig into the compound: I bought a small tub of tile adhesive at Lowe's that is premixed and ready to use.  That makes your job so much easier, as you don't have to mix or wonder if you've gotten the adhesive to the right consistency.

 Spread it out, and trowel it with the trowel, which puts down even little rows that are ready for your tiles to stick to.

Voila... Tiles!   I added grout (again, premixed from Lowe's) and we were done!  The hardest part was keep the edges of the tray clean from the messiness of it all: In the future, I may use painters tape to make the process easier.

Now....do you think I can get him to find me more random office furniture to paint?

The view from the penthouse:

 The penthouse suite, also known as the "third floor" bedroom for the boy!

 There really is this much space: the total size is 5 feet by 12 feet.

 There is plenty of play space at the far end.....

...and we discovered that we can still use the batman curtains from the old bed for this one...still need to be finished, but what a score!  The bat-cave becomes the bat-loft!

I still have a to-do list, and I'm not sure I'll ever be "done" done with this project.  I built without plans and tweaked as I went, so I think I will still tweak along the way for a while.

To do for now:

1. Install rail on wall side. I wasn't going to do this, as it isn't necessary for safety, but it will make it so that you can't fall into the window blinds.
2. Window blinds: Yeah, these are cheap, and we've never replaced them since we moved in. Need to explore options.
3. More reinforcements underneath: I went with 11/32 thickness of plywood. That wasn't a mistake per se as it made it easier for me to wrangle the pieces home and up two flights of stairs (I'm too stubborn to wait for help, I admit it!).  Thicker plywood would be useful, but instead I'm just adding a few more supports underneath with 2x4's.  And 2x4's are a lot cheaper than thick plywood!
4. Hem and hang batman curtains.
5. Take down old curtain hardware.
6. Patch and paint holes.
7. Install some type of lighting underneath the bed for after sunset play.

I think that's it, until I decide to upgrade or change something else! 

Still to come: The space under the loft, and final thoughts, costs and design ideas.  There are always things I learn in these projects that I would do different next time!

We're waiting on:

....a baby beluga!  Yes, true, and no, I did not name him.  Our newest family member is due within the month.  I wanted to make his mama a necklace gift for her baby shower, but didn't know baby's name or, of course, his actual birth date.  I decided to do a placeholder gift, which is a lot more fun to open than a gift card or an IOU, don't you think?

So with his nickname and a due date, mom has this keepsake to have now and will receive a replacement with baby's real name and birth date later.

I always say I make a new design and have a new favorite: this is no exception!

Loft bed, day....whatever....

Fort Carter has access!

Loft bed, continued: Days 3,4,5.....

Work continues on an "as able" basis, so the days of work don't relate to full hours, but pieces here and there.  It is generally going much faster that I expected!  There are learning pains, and I'm putting up joist hangers that is a bit of a learning curve for me. 

The corners went together easily.....

The sides are straight......

.....and the first piece of plywood is up and nailed in!  You can actually sit on the bed at this point.  I think I will have a happy little camper that gets off the bus today!

 

My hints for this round:

• Invest in good clamps.  Wow...what a difference this has made.  It's like having a great set of extra hands, which is nice when you are working with just two. 
• Lumber cuts: Lowe's offers two free cuts of any piece of lumber, and after that each cut is only 25 cents!  I had the plywood cut there.  This helped out tremendously in my time, ease of getting it into the truck, and ease of carrying it up two flights of steps.  Those pieces, even cut, are still very heavy.  Take advantage of this!  Go prepared with your exact cuts and measurements, and it will save you a lot of time, especially if you don't have the necessary tools at home.  In this case, a table saw and another pair of hands would have helped, neither of which I have. 
• Measure measure measure.  Measure again.
• Keep your tools charged.
• Two drills really saves time and irritation.  One for drilling pilot holes, one for screws. 

I have to get back to work!

 

Really? My thoughts on grief

This week gives me a few occasions to reflect on the issue of grief and how, as friends and family, we help those around us who are in the process of grieving a loss.

What do you say?  I suggest a simple "I'm sorry for your loss" and if you are so inclined, "We are praying for your family".   The next step is the hardest: that is the step where you stop talking, hug if you want, but most importantly, stop talking.  

No, I'm not an expert in this field: I'm just sharing life experiences through my own experiences and talking with others that have suffered losses similar to mine.  Those losses pertain to pregnancy and infant loss, but I think the ideas can be used for losses of all types. 

"I'm sorry."  I know, it sounds like something is missing, right? Wrong.  It's perfect just how it is.  "I'm so sorry for your loss" also works.  It's simple perfection, and covers everything that needs to be conveyed to the person grieving.

The most important thing is to say it; don't avoid the situation. A person suffering a loss already feels isolated and different; having friends avoid the obvious just makes it worse.  By conveying your condolences, you aren't "bringing it up" or making the situation worse.  The worst has happened, and your friend needs validation that you realize that.

Then we come to the trickier part, where the human brain starts thinking that surely there should be more, and a simple "I'm sorry" sounds so lame, so we try to tack things on.  This is where the "but" comes in.  "I'm sorry but....."

When I hear the "but" I think "Well, here comes the justification".   I'm sorry for your loss...but....
Anything after the but isn't needed. 

"I'm sorry, BUT....heaven needed him/her more"  Really? I think Heaven is perfect in in and of itself.
"I'm so sorry you lost your pregnancy, BUT it just wasn't meant to be" Really?
"I'm so sorry you lost your child, but God must have wanted him/her more" Really? I don't think God snatches up children for his own happiness....and my van is emptier than the fullness and perfection of Heaven.
"I'm sorry, but wow, what a beautiful angel in Heaven now!"  I thought she would be just lovely here in my arms.
"I'm sorry, but there will be others" Really? Have you seen my medical file?  And I wanted this child, the one whose heart I saw beating a few days ago.

Are you hearing it?  They truly are sorry, but just saying "I'm sorry for your loss" leaves the conversation at the "loss" part: loss, which sucks, and means you lost something you really wanted (a pregnancy) or had (a child) or wanted (the chance to even have a child of your own).  But that is the reality of loss of any kind: that is the point right now that we are in: the loss, the hard part, the grief and pain and darkness.  It's OK to leave it there, and recognize that being there is part of the process.
 I think this can be true for any loss where the "But" tries to make better something that just ...isn't, at least right now. 

Right now, we need to grieve.  Right now we need to cry.  Right now we need you to listen. 

Listen to what?  In my case, here is what I would have wanted someone to know:

• I already had my upstairs re-arranged; where my boy would sleep to make room for the baby/babies.
• I was trying to figure out how to fit a toddler and two more babies in the van the best, and so so excited to see three babies in there.
• They were already part of my family in my head: they pictured in my whole future.
• I pictured them at age 2/4/6/8 and more, three little kids running around. I still do sometimes
• I pictured my son as the older brother already, wondering how he would be
• I already owned new maternity clothes. They had to be returned.  Did I ask for help? No.  But help would have been welcomed.
• I already love this little being whose heart I saw beating.  This was my child, not my fetus or growth or "contents of the uterus" as the medical world had to name it.  It was, and is,  my child.

Pregnancy loss carries a unique set of issues. There is no funeral.  There is no set time of grieving or marking of the occasion of loss of life.

You wake up one day and carry a life.  You wake another and that life is gone.

The message is shared in hushed tones, a card here or there, a whisper, a nod for someone to not ask about "the pregnancy" and so on.  Isn't this odd in a culture that recognizes the sanctity of life starting at day one?  That same culture hushes the situation and doesn't want to make much of it.  A hush, a few hours, a day or two of physical recovery, and move on. Society does not speak of it, mark it, have a ceremony or acknowledge the life in any way.  Strange, isn't it?

And then what happens a few months later? A due date comes around.  The date that the world was supposed to change.  And yet it doesn't change at all; no one even remembers that life was supposed to grace this world this day, a life that you already loved and saw and planned for and dreamed of and hoped for and prayed for.....

I know nothing is helpful without specific ways to help, so here are my suggestions.  I hope they are helpful in the area specifically to pregnancy loss, but also to losses of any kind.

1. Be specific.  Look the person in the eyes and say your condolences. Go out of your way if you need to. 
2. Call. Send a card. Drop off a treat.  Just do something.
3. Ask what the person's due date was: mark it on your calendar. Send another card.  These dates are hard.  Do the same with holidays and birthdates of loved ones: those days will be hard for the family left behind, and not just the first year.
4. Stop by a month/2months/6 months later. Ask them how they are, and let them know you haven't forgotten their loved one, or the fact they they should be holding a six month old child at this point.  Ask them to share memories.  Listen to the same memories over and over.
5. Ask if they have a way they remember their pregnancy in a special way.  They might want to share, they might not.  But I assure you, there is something.  An ultrasound picture, a special plant that appeared in the yard, a photo book, a memory box. 
6. For a pregnancy loss: If you are pregnant and excited, that is understandable.  Take a second to tell me privately....not in the same crowd where everyone will (and is!) excited and overcome with joy.  We get that, we really do.  We just can't handle the joy and our own grief at the same time at this point.  Down the road, we'll be OK.  But not at first.  Don't avoid me, but do ask (quietly, and privately) if there is a way for you to remain close without hurting, and what specific things would be helpful to them. 
7. Baby Shower? This is a difficult thing.  Again, be aware that the grieving parent-to-be or person going through grief of in fertility may not be able to come.  But ask.  And be sensitive that they might want to send a gift, but not attend.  Let them know ahead of time.  Say "I want you to know that you  will be getting an invitation to a baby shower, and I know your loss is still very new.  We'd love to have you, and understand if you can't come.  Is there anything I can do to make this easier for you?"

We have experienced a few losses recently in our family, friends, and church family.  I'm not perfect in my support, but I try to remember what is needed and make the effort.  I don't always succeed....grief is hard.
I only share to hopefully help and remind all of us that we are the ones that need to act in a time of grief.

These are my thoughts. What are yours?